45. I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy.

46. You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

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47. How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.

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48. I have many jokes about unemployed people—sadly, none of them work.

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